does your mom think i'm crazy? i just realized i played both the gay dad and the ex-jew card tonight. i blame the wine
so he stopped for a second, looked up at me and said in a really creepy voice, "I can has cheeseburger?" and then went back to eating me out.
Red Bull/Vodka? You bet I'm showing everyone my penis tonight.
NEVER shave your cleavage hair.
I lost of the blow last night. Found it later in my bag labeled Fairy Dust.
She asked the class if starwars was based on a true story...
Man, i was looking at the pictures i took last night in one i was on the Kentucky line fist pumping with a hobo..wth happened?
This is going to be a 3 day beach sex fest. Do you understand
I don't care if shes your sisters age. Once someone is on my to do list theres only one way to get them off it
halloween is the only time that anne boleyn, the joker, a cowgirl, and a mexican man complete with sombrero and poncho can all hit the same blunt
I never want to hear the words unlimited shots for boobs in the same sentence ever again.
Would you wanna look up as you cum and for a split-second see your dad?
look in the field by the highway and see if there is a high heel there. Or some Taco Bell bags.
eating on the run again ?
Topless Tuesday? One of us will be really happy the other not so much.
WHY CANT I FIND JUST A NORMAL DISNEY LOVING MAN TO PAINT WITH ALL THE COLORS OF THE WIND WITH!!
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