I wish i knew how bad drinking and hieghts were before i got up here
I've never had a better reason to do blow of a Pittsburgh strippers ass than to try and keep pace with my dad.
im so sorry the vomit froze your passenger door shut... you should have stopped.
We glued Jenga blocks together, called it "magic blocks" and sold it to the stoners for $50 and a bottle of Henny
Srsly this has gone to far. Just broke my nose on the toilet. College bars.
This milkshake tastes better than sex. Priorities, I have them.
This is going to be the summer remembered forever as the giant 3 month long mushroom trip.
You will not judge me for my made-up holiday of wine appreciation day
You'll get a boner for sure
Way ahead of you. Kinda awkward while paying rent but hey
There's a dead squirrel in the freezer. Is that what you stopped to get out of the road last night?
Honestly I volunteered because the email made it sound like it was a once in a lifetime opportunity to be a sexual spy kid.
she's throwing knives it scares me
update: broke ceiling. glass everywhere
He bedazzled a shirt for me that said "best head giver" should I be thankful for the gift or concerned that he has a bedazzler?
well apparently i sat in the bathroom staring in the toliet at my vomit. it was blue. how was your night?
I suppose writing him up is more professional than keying his car.
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