it doesn't count as moral degradation if you win the strip off -right?
I woke up to a text that said "You're a fucking asshole" Why is she so pissed at me?
Im guessing it has something to do with running up to her boyfriend screaming "THIS IS SPARTA" and kicking him in the balls.
Is that considered a cock block?
We need to talk about our relationship.
I just won a bet involving 10 tequila shots. You've got about 3 minutes
Then we all started singing, "Our house, in the middle of the street. Our house, fucks a lot of freshman meat". It was magical.
you can feel better about your life now. i slept with a guy who has gold teeth
just to let you know, its not cheating if i cant feel my hands.
It's the first day of summer. It's not a race it's a marathon. Pace yourself
Any man who has a face like that and a bike, deserves a vagina like yours permanently.
It's hard to judge what a reasonable amount of cereal looks like in the spaghetti pot. We're out of cap'n crunch and milk.
I wasn't a groupie because I didn't carry his guitar home
Would you please stop exposing your tits on my couch?
Fuck you, my tits are fabulous
right now I need to figure out a smart way to get an accurate picture of his dick so I know what in dealing with, right now in flying blind.
Idk how much vodka is on these pants but I'm gonna wear them anyway: the biopic
Also food confession I ate an entire bag of starburst jelly beans today. and a plan B. All around think I hit all my nutrients
He held my hair back for me while i vomited in my driveway last night and i repayed him by farting mid-heave.
Randomize
