You tried to convince her that if she gave you head she'd hear the ocean.....
after I pulled back my foreskin she said, "cool like a transformer". I really like her now.
med student doing my blood work at the AIDS clinic just hit on me after I told him i was having unprotected sex, but didn't think i had HIV.
If you wake up tomorrow and start to wonder.... Yes you did just eat mild sauce from taco bell out of the package while informatively yelling about the loss of my virginity
At least I can pee in a cup like a champ at this point
We hooked up in his car and afterwards he cried. I think I need to find a new hookup...
Give me a minute. I'm trying to buy moonshine from a railroad worker named "Cowboy."
I really don't know where my pants are, but that's not the problem. When are you going to unlock the door?
Dropped the bowl in the litter box. But it landed face up. What do I do?
I'm pretty happy on the couch eating Popeyes and watching Cops so if I go over there you better have drugs left
Sooooooo, maybe just fucked on a motorcycle.
True I am eskimo brothers with every one of my room mates, but it was only two girls. And 9 outta 10 times I was first
i'm not sure you can trust me in a car with 20 dozen donuts
dont know what thebfuxk is in rhat shit, but dont lemme have antmore
You drank whiskey for 9 hours and did not eat anything.Nothing good was going to come from that.
Randomize
