my vagina is like the nba. its where amazing happens.
As a matter of fact my bong is named Hulkamania brother
well you decided to make everyone "drinks" which was sprite and beer mixed.
Dude I swear I heard "geet out!!!" when I went down on her. I shouldve listened.
I got used. This is the happiest day of my life. I was just a huge cock and that is all she needed.
I was in a house full of lesbians and they were all staring at me. I felt like the last cresent roll on Thanksgiving.
we didn't have anything to do and wanted to get our money's worth out of our costumes, so if you see two mermaids day drinking by the creek it's us
If anyone ask I'm rushing for brotherhood, not so that this bartender will suck my dick
She walked home carrying a six pack of beer and someone elses cat
SHE BETTER HAVE BROUGHT BACK MY FUCKING COUCH CUSIONS OR SHES GUNNA GET IT.
They switched jackets and you didn't notice. You made out with both of them and had no idea
I can only use one eye at a time. And if I want to listen, I have to close both of them.
I've been wearing the same clothes for 3 days and they're covered in franzia
If my mom's not going to offer me drugs then it's really pointless for me to be here.
You licked my eyeball, you are officially cut off. If you just missed you can have a second chance on Friday.
You're a disaster
Wanna date?
Randomize
