how the fuck does easy mac keep making itself at 3am when i'm wasted? what is this phenomenon?
How wet are you?
Ever heard of a U-boat?
Yes, you did come over last night. You also tried to give my dog a blowjob. You got rejected.
Good lord, they've set up every firework to be ignited by a trail of gasoline at midnight. God save us all.
Petting the cat and listening to "you've got a friend". This is why I smoke weed. To make sense of situations like this.
Bering your kids um. Abiout tol. Throw up
Well still if someone cared enough about u to wish an unwanted child or a disease on u ..u must have been doing something right
Handicvap rails on the toilet atre soooooo fuckin handy right nmow.
And now thanks to shrooms we all got a terrifying glimpse of what goes on in his head. I will not say I didn't see it coming when it turns out he made a suit out of people's skin
We convinced the Dj to let us play musical chairs...... I won by the way.
Guess who just got out of a ticket because the cop liked her costume? THIS GIRL.
Just saw a couple chasing each other on lawn mowers. Oh South Knoxville.
Best walk of shame ever. Wearing a bright purple onesie, covered in smudged childrens make up, carrying my shoes and 1/4 sac of goon. I swear every house I walked past had an elderly couple watering their garden just to watch me
I went out with a plan. I came home with a Brian. THIS WAS NOT PART OF THE PLAN.
I think I'm the first girl to break a bed with a guy, without even having sex with him while doing so.
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