I just got stood up by an 18 yr old. fmylife.
turns out gay frats are just like normal frats, only with more v-necks
I feel like I am becoming dumber sitting here in class than I would be sitting on the couch smoking weed.
we ended up doing shots out of those medicine cups..swine flu finally did something good for me
is 69 when you're sideways or up & down? I was on my back & confused.
through my window right now you can see the hot chick next door is standing BUTT ASS NAKED eating peanut butter off a knife.
ill be there in 5.
it never fails, everytime he manages to fuck my earrings out of my ears.
That poor kid, I literally invited myself over and took advantage of him.
yea I'm sure he was really upset some drunk girl showed up to fuck him.
Do you have to put it that way?
My ex just called and told me that he is on his way to the hospital because he popped a vein in his dick. Should I go to the ER with him or class?
Free tacos and bad night are never used in the same sentence
Back of his car in the Starbucks parking lot WITH HIS APRON STILL ON. Check and Mate.
Holy shit. You won barista bingo AND the Triple Crown in one day.
Gave up on finding an ashtray.... just started flicking it in my purse.
CAN I WEAR ASSLESS CHAPS TO SUNDAY BRUNCH OF JUDGEMENT????
Watching a bear prancing around in a tiara is worth a loss of bar time.
You're right. Cause really... I'm in the back of his head. Even though what I said was better than "I have herpes"... I did once say that to him. So I'm like a reoccurring nightmare.
Randomize
