hi brent please bring bad word music cd must most bad word please brent bring cd music bad word please brent bring cd music bad word
My 3rd grade teacher, who was also my fav, thought i was in prison. That seriously upsets me.
What part of "waking up in the crawl space of my house with a raccoon" sounds like a good night to you?
we just saw you getting yelled at by the cops for trying to 'hijack' a street sweeper...how have you not been arrested yet?
If I remember who won the superbowl tomorrow morning.. I think I'm just going to quit drinking. There really won't be a point anymore
she chugged a bowl of salsa and then gave my ferret weight loss tips. she's like my fucking spirit animal now
Girl we've come a long way since our first Brazilian wax
You do realize how pathetic it is when the woman who does your bikini waxes has seen your vagina more than I have
Also this guy fingered me at the bar and then gave me his card
He's way too stoned. I took him to el bra and he's laying on the table, not sure what to do with him
But seriously. What possible excuse could I come up with to ditch my parents on Christmas to go fuck him?
Please hurry. I'm the only one here who's not an attorney with a trophy wife.
I just remembered that before we left my house I vowed to stay fully clothed and I FAILED
he was wearing a widestriped red gingham suit jacket with complete sincerity im not surprised she beat the shit out of him
5 seconds ago I had no idea that a fart could travel so fastly thru the tanning bed. I taste it in the back of my neck.
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