I think my emotional moodswings have reached a new low. I cried for the entire duration of changing my tampon.
Remind me that when I'm pregnant, I should NOT post vaginal dilation updates on my facebook. Ever.
hey boys, thanks for all the pictures of your dick you took with my camera last night...they were really nice to stumble upon while reliving my night in the breakroom today at work
the guy that filmed erin andrews naked got 27 months in jail. Every man that's seen it should send him cigs and a nail file baked in a cake. We owe it to him.
so according the 72 facebook statuses i put up last night that i don't recall, i would say it was a success. how about you?
there's chocolate cake in my bathtub.. I don't even want to know how the hell chocolate cake wound up in my tub..
you never texted me what you wanted from the store so I got a piece of chicken and bottle of tequila. if you want anything else you are on your own.
Sorry about sucking tonight. Drunk truck fucking is apparently not my strong point.
soon, soon....
I don't believe you anymore. You're like the boy who cried coitus.....
Ok there's 63 pics of you jerking it on my camera from New Years. The time stamps say it took you 40 min to get there too. See a doc, your only 22.
Are there any plans to where i might need to be dressed semi-nicely or is it a "pants optional" weekend?
Get your clothes on you are our DD for the night. The usual three way payment
When you wear a dress that resembles the shape and color of Kirby to a wedding, you get the attention you deserve.
Sex. Target parking lot. I really am the mayor.
It was like he was 23 all over again. Madness. I. was. so. scared.
Randomize
