spell your last name, im trying to find you on facebook
It was amazing what she could do with her one good arm.
how do I tell him nicely and in french that we can't have sex anymore because his huge penis will ruin me for other french men?
I love waking up with his head head between my legs, it makes me feel special
he sent me a picture of his dick with a heart border around it
He tried to say the picture wasn't him. Like I'd forget his curved boner.
The guy I met last night said we had a real connection and gave me his AA coin because he met me during his relapse
Him cheating on his girlfriend resulted in a $1500 hospital bill from repeated blows to his testicles by my ass. They diagnosed his pain as "testicle trauma". Sex karma at it's finest.
First thing that comes on in the morning is kanye's I can't hold my liquor. yeezus lives.
I guess that's what I get for clicking on a link that says clown penis.
You declared that afternoon sex will be referred to as "wet naps" from now on
sigh, if only his dick was as big as his mouth
After finding out he was married when we were together, I don't trust him.
So I figured out why that guy from Tinder stopped messaging me back. He got married.
I feel asleep with my contacts in, with my arms wrapped around a bottle of vodka. Also... Do we have class today?
Randomize
