After we had sex, she played this little piggy with my toes
the lady at Walgreens winked at me when i asked where the cherry chapstick was... damn u katy perry!
i was gonna tell him a really embarassing story about you, but then i remembered im in all of them
So I've come to the conclusion that I would cry if I had an ugly baby.
On the quad today: An amish choir singing something weird, and not 30 feet away 3 girls tanning topless. Definition of diversity.
I swear if his heart was half the size of the cum stains he's left on my sheets we would have the perfect relationship
He wants to make love to me in a sea of paint and wash my tears away with the brushes surrounding us..I've known him for 2 days.
oh my god. the driver of our party bus just said "no drugs unless you're sharin," my confidence in him is not high at the moment
Just missed the last train for another 5 hours. There are balls in or around the mouth of my life.
I BIT YOU IN THE DINING ROOM. I bit you and you crunched
She's just done the monthly not prego dance around our kitchen
Why must everything this weekend have to do with something going into or coming out of my vagina?
She said she forgot something.. and when she came out she was carrying a garden gnome, and a bottle of vodka. she was too hot to question it.
It will be too late. I will have fornicated with the enemy by then.
My professor just asked for my number. Not fucking her till after finals though I learned my lesson last time.
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