i met a boy and i'm in lovvvvveeeeeeee and we're going to vegas and getting marrrrrriiiieeeeedddddd!
let's be honest with each other here, that's about the worst idea you've ever had. you need to walk this one off.
You were right. It hurts to walk today.
I'm actually pretty neutral about a lot of things. I'm like Switzerland with a penis.
I just opened a gallon of milk that is good through the 10th of January- I hope I can say the same for myself.
there was naked duck duck goose
how does that even get suggested?!
after naked leap frog.... it wasn't that big of a deal
Cumming on a girls face is guy code for you're not wife material.
Should I be alarmed that you're a regular enough at a bar to show up in sweatpants?
You need to get here now. Before they realize I'm not puerto rican.
Im blasting "Fat Bottom Girls" as loud as humanely possible in attempts that old ladies doing water aerobics will take the hint and get the fuck out of the pool.
Come over we're drinking with orange soda as a chaser to honor 90s nick kenan and kel.
I don't mean to ruin your favorite Disney movie...but...we both came when Mufasa died.
This is actually a pretty big deal for him. I mean, he contacted a stranger out of concern for someone else instead of for sex.
That does show growth.
I would've hung out with you if I had the capacity to do anything besides fall over and pee on things
What's sexier than showing up smelling like fast food cigarettes with a jar of moonshine in your hand
They are like untrained puppies reaking havoc on a newly furnished house. Out of control.
You just compared our vaginas to a newly furnished house...I can dig it.
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