How wet are you?
Ever heard of a U-boat?
im getting my college education on yahoo answers.
Well unless he sent his sperm via fedex, this baby isnt his
Until last night, I had never actually thrown up ON a sandwich
I am trapped in a bar with french tattooed drug dealers who also blow glass art. Just in case this is bad, know what happened.
During breaking dawn, he leaned over and asked me why she would have to worry about her period since she essentially just married a walking super-absorbant tampon... It was the best way to ruin those movies for me.
She twisted her ankle and paid a homeless guy for a piggy back ride home from the bar.
I'm looking at some sugar baby profiles to get some insight on what we're up against.
Well, it's a fine line between people-watching and boob-staring. It's a gray area. But we're in Paris. Let's leave it at that.
Dude, my ex girlfriend showed up, bought me a tequila shot, made out with me and then disappeared into the night. Then her current girlfriend saw, so she came over and slapped me and then I made out with her too
This was before halftime
I RUINED A LESBIAN RELATIONSHIP BEFORE HALFTIME
He just pulled a Spanish chick using google translate!!!! We are at the bar and she speaks zero English. Hes a fucking magician!!!!!!
I mean, I already put pants on today. We're already halfway there
Must be why he thought choking was foreplay. Like WTF? No.
my very deepest apologies for the unintentional cock block.
may or may not have snorted a line of tums... wtf.
Randomize
