after he passed out we removed everything electronic from his room, stuck in some old books and an ancient typewriter from goodwill. for 20 min. we had him convinced he'd drunk himself backward in time.
Yeah I hope so. Definately just saw two freshmen in very authentic togas and cotton ball beards. This new class is stepping it up.
And a psychic told me I was pregnant and I am just so over life right now.
Hey, no judgement here...this is the girl that threw up on a box of kittens at the magician's house
Had to crawl to the kitchen this morning cuz I was too hung over but really wanted fruity pebbles. yes. I ate fruity pebbles on the kitchen floor.
Aaaand my life has been reduced to whether I can reach to flush my puke down the toilet using my foot. The answer is yes.
You know me. im down for anything that could harm my well being. lets dress like dolphins so everyone will see what dicks they are.
I have a 16 minute video of you talking about your life. We are calling it your Anthology sponsored by Steel Reserve
I'm taking a dab in mourning of how long its been since I smoked with you guys.
I'm studying. And by studying I mean I am laying on my floor drinking boones farm alone. Last two weeks. Fuck it.
How don't you remember..? You were getting handfuls of skittles out from our bra screaming TASTE THE RAINBOW.
Oh BTW the next time I see you I don't care where we are your dick will be going into some part of my body.
Of course his biggest mistake was assuming that I ever gave a fuck to begin with.
Do you think it's a bad sign of the outcome of the pregnancy test I'm about to take that I was eating a fudgsicle on the way into the drugstore? Would it make worse to tell you I also bought a big ass bag of Cornnuts?
Need to use your shower bro.
FWB wearing glitter again?
It’s like she’s marking her territory
Randomize