whats the weirdest thing you ever masturbated to?
King Triton
i don't even remember going to get food. i think i got gas too.
You bring the bicep workout. I'll bring the unscented gentle products. We'll both bring our penises.
we all know badassery is carried on the XX chromosome
After we smoked, the cops questioned us but i just asked if he wanted to join our basketball team.
Scored tix to flower show. Do we want to go drunk on Saturday or hungover on Sunday? Only two options.
The closest thing to a sext that you will ever receive from me is a picture of pepperonis on Greg's asscheeks, clenching.
My dad just sent me a text reminding me to bring the family beer pong championship belt. Thanksgiving 2012 just got real
Some girl took her panties off, soaked them in vodka and wrung them out into a line of guys' mouths! Awesome!
No, NOT awesome. Where the fuck do you go drinking!?!
I thought my life was going to shit but then I read about Amanda Bynes and I realize it's not so bad
You gave your one night stand my number. I told him you left for your sex change an hour ago.
Please don't try and hook up with one of your high school teacher's friends
What kind of true American would I be if I didn't just smoke weed in my bathrobe on my back porch in the middle of suburbia on 4/20? #stepmomoftheyear
Quick question—how good are you at digging holes? I mean, besides the one you've dug for yourself. asking for a friend
I slept with six men with different nationalities this week. Who says I'm not a woman of culture?
Randomize
