You screamed, "I am going to fuck this cheeseburger". They all started laughing until you actually started having sex with the cheeseburger.
He just said "Chunky" very loudly in his sleep.
she used her one phone call to ask me about my day
Only you could be admitted to the ER and walk out with a nurse's phone number. I wish I was gay
he just asked if we wanted to go to an arts and crats club with him tomorrow. every day it becomes harder for me to defend his sexuality
Nothing is more awkward than taking a dump while someone is crying in the bathroom.
Lets just say I tried to pinky promise the cop... So I was fucked up.
I also woke up in a guys bed in a Reptar shirt yesterday morning staring at a movie theater sized poster of the not as popular Air Bud franchise movie Super Buddies.
Yeah! Just remind me to. I'll also bring the blow up penis
Trying to stay sober at a family function but hiccuping so fucking loud. "Have you been drinking?" I hit on my cousin so yeah. I have been drinking.
Come home, I'm drunk on the porch and pretending to smoke breadsticks like cigarettes. Enticing, right?
i think im in europe. pls send help
If I take one more surprise finger up the ass this week there will be hell to pay.
He sent me a picture of his cock that seemed to indicate that we were still on good terms.
A drunk frat boy just jumped on the hood of my car while I was driving down Bridge St. He yelled at me to keep going since he was playing frogger and needed another car to jump on... or a log. I hate this town.
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