Just had a girl agree to give me a blowjob in exchange for wearing my jacket during class. Talk about successful negotiations. Best day of my life
He just kept yelling woof and then threw money all over me...
There is a semi-attractive guy at the door who's looking for you. Says he met you on Chatroulette. Start explaining NOW.
It'd be like medium rare by now.
I love how we're talking about your vagina like it's a piece of meat.
i really care about you, respect you, another gay word, and another gay word... lets just drink
She just said, "are my livers going to die?"
You left me with no money to have random Chicago sex. The least you can do is pick me up an egg mcmuffin on your walk of shame back to the hotel.
Keep your head up. His game is good, and you should be honoured to be a notch on his wall. If it makes you feel better, if it wasn't you, it was going to be me.
Finding out he was uncircumcised by feeling his foreskin in my mouth was NOT ideal. New rule. Lights ALWAYS on.
Clearly it doesn't get better with age. Just more sexual
I have managed to reach the 'after meth poster look' before lunch here...
I let a blind guy feel me up. All he kept saying was "oh fuck yeah!"
How many times is too many times to use the word 'fuck' in my thesis?
We were fucking in the boat on the lake when another boat saw us and honked their appreciation.
Butt Stuff 2016 unites us all
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