I faked an abortion last night.
i just want to meat her and do terribly wonderful things to her vagina...
I miss having pregnancy scares ....at least i knew i was having a good time
My T9 Word has dryhumped saved but I can't even get it to figure out bbq.
Just threw up off a chairlift. my life is now complete.
I had a new years resolution not to be a whore anymore, but I think I'm gonna wait till 2011
I think the puke all over the side of my car actually improves its appearance.
i think its awesome that according to your mom i'm your friend that caught on fire.
Just got a free shot w my beer...it's not quite 11am yet...I love international travel. These people aren't judgmental.
nothing can ever be as bad as the night i blacked out, updated my fb status to i need a pity fuck and then passed out for 13 hours.
Just Everbombed a Guiness to make up for cutting out early last night. Also the Mars probe. Happy birthday motherfucker!
But if you were going to pour a liquid on your naked body in fall its definitely pumpkin inspired something.
WELP I KNOW THE HAPPY HOUR DRINKS WERE GOOD BECAUSE MOM JUST INFORMED ME I AM THE RESULT OF POKED HOLE IN THE DIAPHRAGM
I just my had my first cup of coffee in a week. I think I might orgasm.
We had sex then laid in his bed eating chocolate and drinking juice boxes. I think I'm going to keep him around.
Randomize
