Hey its bob the builder. Where did you go?
i just used my scantron for my final to make paper shotglasses. i'd say i passed in flying colors.
Is there any way you can check to see if I have a warrant out in Alabama?
she asked me which thongs i though her boyfriend would like best. fuck the friend zone
JAMES WASHOMGTON STATE ATTACKED US
WE'RE FYCKED UL HARDCORW
THE REISLING ATRACEX US
He just keeps repeating "this isn't my bagel".. i'm worried for his safety
the bar just sent me a facebook message congratulating me on being a regular and getting such good grades. my life is not real.
Nothing like puking into an empty cooler at a red light on the way to get plan b.
That's true. There's really no bad time to take a Vicodin.
It is the Reeses peanut butter cup of pharmaceuticals.
An don't say it's "personal preference" cause I don't buy it. I just want to have normal cool guy balls. I don't want to be the dude that's still rocking the equivalent of the "mid 90's bowl cut" of scrotum haircuts.
Awee what are you going to name your new dog?
What dog?
Drunk and alone at a magic show is what my life has become without you
How do you tell a woman that you are seeing that the scars on your back are from her awesome-in-bed little sister?
Banged former boss. Adulthood achievement unlocked.
Fun fact: My predictive text now prompts "walrus" as the most likely word to follow "intoxicated"...
Randomize
