sorry probably not gonna make it :( kinda tied up right now
sad face, r u gay?... wait like really tied up?
:)
About tomorrow. if it dosent fit dont force it. Just pushit as far as you can and i'll wiggle the rest of the way
Awesome. My fame will spread to DC... As will the herpes.
I'm not saying going to the volleyball games drunk on Tuesday night was a bad idea I'm just saying we shouldn't make a routine of it.
Thanks for last night. Sorry if i was obnoxious. I respect your morals and i wouldn't want you to lose your virginity to a drunk girl in your mom's prius.
Side note: I think I fell asleep holding a cereal box
I'd appreciated it if you didn't lick my boyfriends face again. I'm askin nicely. Thank you.
I ate a pepperoni off of someone's floor last night. We need to talk.
Heard in class today that they replaced our carpet in last years apartment because they couldn't get the smell out, dude we smoked way to much pot last year.
It wasn't good. I can tell by the way he fucks me he watched too much porn
The guy next to me in the library just got a call from his roommate asking him to come bail him out of jail...we need to step up our game.
The Uber driver took us to a Waffle House. We didn't even say anything when we got in. MAGIC.
You've discovered your super power: Your Vagina
I think I just scared the sex out of my booty call. He saw me at the grocery store using one of those "future mother" parking spots right next to the handicap ones. He just made eye contact and drove off. I regret my laziness.
there is definitely a hickey on my left nipple.
Randomize
