You would DIE at the bar we're at right now. All indian/asian med students, I swear
Asian doctor ratio. So hot. I would've gone into heat
I think I'm going to die by hangover. I'm in my spanish class. So I guess I'm going to be muerte.
Paddidles count extra in the back of a cop car
he said he "kind of had sex before.. Barely" i think it was one of those situations where you slide into home and get tagged out.
It's an open bar on a yacht... I'm going to drown.
I need $500 dollars more than I need a night of dignity... I gonna do it.
The guy in the next stall screamed courtesy flush and then puked. Bless you Vegas
i looked up and she was looking over the stall watching me pee and told me to unlock the door. that dedicated to sucking my dick.
Oh dude, thanks for giving me that liquor last night, except replace 'giving' with 'violently forcing'.
I am so hung over a medically induced coma is beginning to sound appealing.
He told me to come in and have some water before I drove home, my vagina didn't stand a chance escaping. We didn't even make it to the kitchen.
He's so drunk he thinks he's the ultimate warrior. Told cops he was from parts unknown. Never broke character
She's opening her family birthday cards at the bar. So we can pay our tab. Bitches wrote checks :(
After we had sex he began to tell me the craziest places he's had sex. He told me KFC bathroom so I rolled over and went to sleep.
He got mad at you last time bc you tried to rap battle him via text. This is strictly business.
Randomize
