i hate that site..its like every vagina you dont wanna see
I don't know how to say this, but I think you're a fucking bitch and the sooner you die I'll be happier.
Sorry- wrong number! :)
In a tragic sexting typo, I typed the word "blobjob". Now she's coming over and I have no idea what I'm in for...
I fucked her while she was wearing her boyfriends dogtags. I'm officially a bad american
He tipped the stripper with quarters. After that not even the waitress would talk to us. I had to move to another table to get a lapdance
He passed out on the floor and you kept hitting him in the dick and screaming "hammer of justice".
whatever. i don't care. i just want to be drunk wrapped in an american flag.
oh wow I have been there. Hell one time Matt and I woke up naked with pizza rolls in the bed.
Next Halloween I want us to dress up as jockeys, get drunk, and ride a carousel all night until we throw up or declare a winner
You have ruined sex with him for me. Now all I think is "boy scout" and I want to go home
I should never be allowed to dance around children at weddings. I think I just insured that a 4 year old will be a future teen mom.
currently buying a pregnancy test while braless so happy november to you too
But that's fine. Because I am an independent woman who is going to pull some jane Goodall shit and save the world one day......or be a porn star......either way they are going to wish they had fucked me.
I told him I wanted to fuck him and he hasn't texted me back in 4 days...am I missing something
The end of the friendship was inevitable. I hooked up with her cousin and forgot to mention it to her
Randomize
