Did I ever tell you that the first person i made out with cried?
Letd wlk him
Lrtd walek hime
Lets wlk home,,,ther we go
She calls me Shortcake and bites my ear. Trust me, I'm FINE with bein the secret lesbian lover.
Is it possible to have pulled a muscle in my neck from passing out with my head in a bucket?
And if it was a miscarriage you should figure out whose it was. He must be an alphamale for his offspring to sustain life this long in the amusement park that is your body
this cock blocking thing really has to end bro...its one thing to tell jen i live with my mom.. its another to cut the brakes on my car..
First week back and I made to one class, its gonna be okay after all.
Now you know my pain. Live with it. Own it. Recognize it. Cause its like shitting napalm.
somebody went from crying while watching Full House, to a full on emotional raging bull...I love this time of the month
Finding out you're not a mother on Mother's Day >>>
My moms new boyfriend looks like Stu Pickles if he was in a biker gang. He gave me free coke though, so come party?
And despite my lack of successful relationships I'm a fucking guru
That's like claiming you're a good coach but going 2-12 last season
I'm waiting for you in a manthong right now.
I'm gonna make out with this 38 yr old. Mark my words. I don't even have daddy issues.
Dude, she stopped mid blow job to ask the cat's name. ADHD might be a deal breaker after all.
Randomize
