Kelly, is this rhetorical, or sarcastic? You are very kind & quite beautiful, but we never really evolved into anything & your prevailing ambivalence spoke more than words ever could.
"We" really do not exist-if we ever did. Both of us may have been hoping for more than was possible.
I would enjoy sitting down to talk about the dissolution, but think it may end up being counter productive.
I just threw up on my dentist
Having him eat chocolate out of you is not as romantic as it sounds. I'm still finding pieces.
you threw up out the window, wiped your face with a twenty dollar bill, and threw that out the window too.
did we at least go back and get it?
how else do you think we got jack in the box...?
you started keeping track of only every even numbered drink you had
she asked to have her picture taken with every guy we walked by.
Hey so I just want to get straight to the point it was me who ate the last cupcake and it was your sister who I fucked last nigt
Just got a nosebleed, my period and the runs all at the same time. I'm either dying, or this is the first sign of the apocalypse. You warning you in case it's the latter.
I almost died in that meeting. Nearly dried up and blew away in the pure powder form of boredom
I know that feel bro
He came to my Harry Potter marathon wearing a Hogwarts uniform. Of course I fucked him.
So here's a brief summary of my weekend: last night I drank four glasses of Death Punch, grabbed the toaster, said "This is mine", put it in my pants and walked out the front door.
I cannot, in good conscience, let you talk to a guy who wears Chaps and a knit beanie
I told him we can’t see each other today because absence makes the heart grow fonder but mostly I just need to rest my vag
Buying a new pipe this morning, and setting up career plans this afternoon. It's called balance
He ate me out on the front lawn of the post office. The people in the office across the road definitely got a show!
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