Ha. No worries! So loud here &god I love drag queens! How does it happen, the congealing?
Lesson learned: don't hide your vodka in your little brothers toy box.
just spent all of my last class as a college student, vomiting in the bathroom. its moments like these i will cherish
I don't even know why I got my vag waxed
Ugh, tell me about it. As each day passes and the hair grows more, I get a little more depressed.
There is a girl in bio drinking beer out of a starbucks cup with a straw
Haha he acted like he's never seen a tampon catapolt across the hall before
Your never gonna wash that desperation outta that sweatshirt you know.
Just found a peacock feather in my car. Should I be the least bit concerned about this?
So my bf wanted to cum on my face and I let him. Afterwards I wiped some off, wiped it across his forehead and said, "The king has returned".
I'm going as either a recovering alcoholic, or as a guy who came to the party straight from work. Too literal?
Don't forget Giraffe in your car! If we show up in the same outfit without animal heads we're just gonna look weird.
dude, i just accidentally flashed your mom. BIG TIME.
But wait then while giving his drive thru order he goes in mid sentence, "Hey baby it's Travis remember me?"
I had a dream last night that I used a condom when I had sex. That's how I knew it was a dream
I think someone shaved off all their pubes in the handicap stall or a werewolf stopped by the office to take a crAzy dump!
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