Paul doesn't remember going to the bar and slept on someone's porch...doesn't know whose porch...maybe near Howard U.
this kid just came up to me and asked me if i wanted to play truth or aids with him and his friends. i'm in
When the phrase "Wow your huge" came out of her mouth I knew it was gonna be a good night.
Ok, but If I make this happen, my first born son gets to fuck your first born daughter
i'm sure god appreciates how great my boobs look during this fine christmas eve mass
You ad-libbed two DETAILED rounds of price is right, 1 wheel of fortune, and 1 deal or no deal.... by yourself with sound effects and music included
Ok if you are accepting my apology, please continue to ignore me. If you are not, please fill out the brief survey that follows, to help me improve my people relations: a) your a bitch please leave me alone b)your crazy pls leave me alone c) I never cared ab u please leave me alone. D) all of the above e) all of the above but I wouldn't mind still fucking u. F) who are you again? Your answer will not b shared and will b used in accord. With the law. TY
Doing lines of coke with a $100 dollar bill off a 6in x 9in photo of your childhood self really tells you where you where you've gotten in life.
Instead of sending me a picture of his dick, he sent me a drawing of it on drawsomething. This game is getting out of control.
I was convinced to buy a man thong.
But it's Armani so it's okay.
God I just out gayed myself.
You tried crawling through the apartment window instead of going through the wide open door next to it
I'm running late...how do you explain period shits to your boss?
Sean just lit a cig with his taser..... I am in awe
That awkward moment when you were so fucking drunk lastnight that you and your fuck buddy wake up wearing eachother's clothing covered in hot cheetos with his cat curled up between your heads meowing. Thought you'd appreciate this moment with me.
That man makes my giblets tingle
Congrats? I think?
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