being a part time student has turned me into a full time alcoholic.
I just realize today that I've dated three guys this year with their own blog. Ugh that's embarrassing.
you have a cum towel under your bed, you're the definition of single
There are pictures of you on the shoulders of some old guy dressed as borat
I guess birthday shots aren't always the answer
SEXX, SEXX, SEXX,SEXX,SEX SEX SEXXXXXXX SEX SEX SEX SEX SEX SEX SEXSEXSEXSEXSEXSEX SEXSEXSEXSEXSEX.\nimagine that to the can can song. also come to my house. theres a dance routine.
You were riding my three year old's train yelling, 'I think I can, I think I can!!'
I thought I could.
Eating a TV dinner and watching Goosebumps on Netflix, the sad, sad title of my autobiography.
I don't remember how I broke my nose last night, but I woke up with dried blood everywhere. Also, you should tell that guy how you feel.
I was going to say "wearing plaid doesn't make you gay, I wear plaid!" but then... heavy sigh
Is it completely inappropriate to base my morning after pill purchase on if they sell coffee or not?
I just fell down my stairs, guess that's how my sunday is gonna go
Jarrod's passed out on the chair with a cup of milk and I've been staring him down in an attempt to use telepathy to make him spill it. Attempts unsuccessful.
wow. that really looks like a penis. not a top hat
She’s the kind of asshole whose face I want to put on a T-shirt just so I can go outside and burn it.
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