This girl is more easily done than said...
im 80% sure the guy across from me is taking pictures of my legs
Dude, it's gettin so bad even my fantasies just wanna be friends.
I wish I could get plan B off e-bay so it would be a secret and cheap.
Opened my wallet to find a slice of ham with a phone number written on it in sharpie.
Sleeping with two different guys who share a driveway is getting increasingly challenging to keep secret
Dude. Zebras have bad attitudes.
Dont make this weird.... I was wondering if I could paper mache a few of your dildos this weekend?
Currently studying Econ, while waiting outside current booty call's residence for him to return from the strip club. This is your fault.
You went into the shower with my roommate and cursed him out asking why he was there
Blow job season was short but glorious.
I remember looking at his body and thinking wow you have a body sculpted by Jesus himself. Still not sure if I said that out loud or not
strip teases shouldnt end with an expensive car covered in salsa and mayonnaise yet here we are
Sarah just give sum homeless dude a lap dance, took like 2$ worth of change from his cup and was all like, "Biiitch, this aint free"..
Yea.. And you'll love me a whole lot more when I start letting my vagina make all the decisions..
Randomize
