Yes, one should always join a cult. At least once.
And her vagina tasted EXACTLY like a slim jim
we found you eating frozen orange juice with a spoon and then drinking vodka from the bottle.
Even tho I saw his penis. He is still a really nice guy.
he said i looked like a lion with slutty lingerie on .
be proud. or at least amused. an 18 yr old and a 25 yr old at least makes my average hookup age this week the same as my age.
Let me get this straight, you're telling me to lower my standards? Even though last week you told me I don't have any..?
Riding the train home at 6 am for class still drunk is losing its novelty in my junior year
My whole house smells like Spaghetti-Os and cat litter. I think I've failed as an adult.
Got a high five from a Superman stripper tonight
Leaving Denver airport I just saw a group of young Republicans in matching green T-shirts that said "4/20 Baby!"
He was like the most intimidating looking guy you've seen in your life except he was really shittily doing the two step
I feel kind of like we’re in a gang and tonight is one of those “people are gonna know not to fuck with us” type of nights. And then tomorrow I am going to learn to pole dance. I’m not really sure how I got to this point in my life… but I like it.
I'm not totally useless... You can use me as an example of what not to do
You drank the pool water to get rid of your hiccups
Randomize
