I got everything I ever gave her back, every picture, and money for the dog. I didn't want it she brought it all back and gave it to me. clothes jackets, pictures, dried flowers, ear rings, necklace...
Sell it on ebay and let's go to the bar
It took you an unbelievable amount of time to realize that your ass was on fire.
Just got to school and somone already mentioned the amount of cereal im carrying.
Hippo gnu deer
Idea for the cake. Joints for candles. Do it.
And the clouds opened up and the sex gods said I hate you alfalfa
I just came so hard there were tears. Actual tears.
Ugh I miss culture and lesbians already
Is it weird that I noticed my lower half feels strange and then further realized it's bc I'm wearing underwear to bed for the first time in weeks..maybe months?
Dude you spoke to a girl about CRICKET. She MUST want sex
you don't even have a vagina so you don't get to tell me what to put in mine
We knew it was an interesting night when we found my thong wrapped around a chocolate chip muffin in the fridge.
You cannot ask her to resend the picture of her genital tattoo to you just so you can show your room mate. it is time to end your relationship with the Captain.
You have ten minutes starting with this message to get here. Or I'm putting my clothes back on.
Can you get an STD by sharing underwear? Walk of shamed home and realized I was wearing someone else’s panties
No one knows. This doesn’t happen to normal people.
Randomize
