Well I thought I'd be nice but yeah I'm not a fan of you either you're an arrogant stupid cocky unfunny loser. Don't talk to me you're crazy
I hate when laundry day is determined by the number of cum stains on my bed
ah, there's nothing like waking up to picture messages of a strange man's cock. life is good.
haha, that's fucked up. flacid cock pictures are the mental breakfast of champions.
Her little brother walked in right as I was finishing and was like "uhhh hey there's a lunar eclipse outside"
You were offering to spell people's name for a dollar.
.......The other day I peed on him in the shower....he was trying to touch my boobs and I wanted my space.
Haha its fine we ask know it. He's still cool thought
Focus on the keyboard man. Focusssss
Dude that chick had a dog in her car. Like when she goes bar hoping so does roofus. He gaurds the car.
I was so gone I thought the cops banging on my door were kids from the party trying to get into my room... needless to say, I started moaning louder so they would take the hint.
I climbed through his window to find him already with another booty call. This wouldn't have happened if I could upgrade from my 7th grade scooter to a real car.
…If I were you I wouldn't use that as part of your argument to your dad for a car
Sorry for face planting onto the table with all our alcohol on it
Should I be scared that after we hooked up she took antibiotics with Sailor Jerry's?!
Tell him that his phone is taped to the dog's stomach. Stop trying to call it because it makes him scared.
you are the only girl i know that would bring a plate of cookies to a hook up. but they were awesome. thanks. next time cupcakes?
Irony: drinking your pre workout supplement out of the cup your Krispy Kreme doughnut holes came in.
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