Guess what? I had way too much to drink today. I'm properly wasted. Doing chores and playing video games while drunk. It's the nexus of stupidity and responsibility.
I don't know what happened last night but I woke up this morning with "wolf pack" tattooed on my knuckles.
Apparantly 7 1/2 Vicodin is a 1/2 too many.
He said "ride me pocahontas" while I was on top of him last night
Why i have shady connections. Owner just txt me asking to come by and judge the new stripper.
Why is there a chicken nugget nailed to my front door?
I just want to let you know how hung over I am today and I fucked a girl in a kangaroo costume last night.
I fell asleep after the worst sex of my life and now I'm snowed in with him. SEND HELP. CALL FEMA. GET ME OUT OF HERE.
that man is just a bundle of powerful magic and poor judgment
And if you ever tell anyone that I have emotions ill kill you
I woke up naked in this guys bed and the first thing I start saying is it's super bowl Sunday like I was yelling
SHE MASTURBATED TO THE THOUGHT OF ME HAVING AN ALL DUDE THREESOME WITH HER EX BOYFRIENDS.
Give me a few. Gonna ride the rollercoaster.
NOT PREGNANT HIGH FIVE!
I'm getting reacquainted with drunk me. She has grown up a lot.
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