You found a girl to hook up with at a gay bar?
No. His name was Paco. I didn't get it by choice. I never had a hickey before.
So i had sex for a couple seconds last night
I'm upset that MJ died and all but waking up to his face on my HDTV in the middle of the night while half-asleep is pretty much the scariest fucking thing ever.
I should just throw a hundred dollar bill into the wind and walk away... save myself the hangover.
He gave Paula abdoul a run for her crazy
At least you weren't that one girl in the bar that was letting everyone draw on her in sharpie. Worst decision I've ever witnessed.
This escort grabbed my boyfriends ass and it became clear, he fucked pretty much anything he could find prior to dating me.
At my wifes high school reunion. Found out her nickname was 'Back Door Brooke'. EVERYONE is calling her that.
We were eating hotdog buns dipped in French onion dip in lawn chairs at 4am. That drunk
I'm gonna write a book one day about how to be the less attractive person girls settle for after getting dumped. I will send you a copy
Again??? Now we can't ever fucking go there again STOP PEEING IN FOYERS
all i've had to eat today is leftover bday cake and a shot of tequila.
welcome to college.
All I know is that I got to have an orgasm yesterday during sex so nobody can put a damper on my day, NOBODYYYYYY
the awesomest thing about staying behind in our lame ass dorm room by myself during spring break: I've now nutted in 3 inconspicuous locations on your side of the room. brag to me again about how fucking awesome tahoe is you shithead. I dare you.
he broke off the kiss to ask "can I grab your boob?" like props for asking for clear and concise consent but there HAS to be a sexier way to do it
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