I was like, "um, that's my butthole."
dude, seriously he just sucked the milk out of the dogs breast and swallowed it... for $20, wtf....?
They asked if I wanted to shotgun a beer and before i could ask who had a knife they all had bit holes into the cans. Im never leaving Germany!
The beer-amid has reached five feet. Caitlyn has a taser. GTG
Your cousin just asked the bartender to start a round of vagina shots. Not body shots. Vagina shots. We're taking her out more often.
only thing in my fruit bowl is 4 champagne corks and a jenga piece . Tuesday.
Whats your number? 5 or more?
Cinco. It sounds smaller in Spanish.
Are you aware that you called me "Sexy clit lady" last night?
Sleeping in a car was not on my list of plans for the night.
My life is a video game called get the drunk princess back to her castle, thank you to all that participated
And then he dove into my vagina like scrooge mcduck into a room of gold
Would it be crossing a line if I told him that I now know his girlfriend has a huge mole on her left ass cheek?
We stole a Christmas tree from the student center and then decorated it with everything we stole from parties... All I have to say is Feliz Navidad!
I think it's your fault my nipples aren't sensitive anymore.
No bra. No panties. Makeup from last night. At work right now. I am trash.
Randomize
