I just saw a commercial that said "call your doctor if erections last more than 4 hours". I said "disgusting" and my mom said "I know, i hate when that happens." Get me out of here.
Apparently I added "small children" to my likes on facebook. glad to know that's where my subconscious is at.
I just typed my entire senior project presentation on my blackberry,
no memory loss, but i'm unhappy with my memories
at which point I apparently ran in and shouted "I made the sex with that one!"
Somehow ended up at a stranger's bridal shower. Everyone else is already drunk.
I dunno, but she kept buying me shots and asking me to go places with her. oh btw we're signed up to go bungee jumping Saturday
All I know is that your reaction after this date with him was "I think I did cocaine" so I'm sold on this boy
Oh you know, we just bobbed for apples in a bucket full of jungle juice. So, a casual Tuesday night.
Come over so we can have two person sex in this one person tent
Beat the bartender in a shot challenge for a free tab. I won that, and him. I never get tired of the "this is my first time with a guy.." bullshit.
How do you even...
The magic of Christmas. And whiskey, of course.
I've orgasmed four times in the past 24 hours. And my mom's dropping off cookies later
GETTING HORNY AT RANDOM IS REALLY FUCKING INCONSIDERATE.
Wound up hungover. Visiting 4 y/o nephew suggested cookies and milk and playing Kirby with him with the sound down. This kid is going places.
So the tow truck driver didn't charge us because Ian convinced him that he was sent out by God to share his cocaine with us.
Randomize