therell be strippers and coke right?
no strippers. just coke.
i hate this fuckin recession
dude your alot more fun to hang out around now that your addicted to coke...but seriously you need to stop
It was my first time buying condoms at the liquor store... I was nervous and there were quite a few people, so I tried to do it as quickly and quietly as possible. When I got to the Indian cashier, he took one look at them and said loudly, "Ohhh you gonna get it on tonight, ah?!"
For future reference, a lint roller appears to be the easiest way to get glitter out of a beard.
Well I say she's a whore. All four of her kids have different last names.
BUT, one is Johnson and the other is Johnston. She gets some credit for that
halloween is SO much better on drugs, why didn't anyone let us know about this when we were kids
I just remembered how awesome your handjobs were in 7th grade, you were a true champ, thank you
Today has been the most awkward masturbatory day of my life. Possibly even more awkward than when my mom found my vibrator on Mother's Day.
I just found a video of you asking to be a whale with me.
You screamed "there will be blood" and punched some random guy in the face. So no, we can't go back to that bar.
I want my birthday to be like the hunger games where all the contenders for my vaj have to fight each other off to win the prize
Can I have the second place winner?
I plan to get very, very drunk when I get off work.
But doesn't your shift end at like noon?
I don't think you understand.
Nothing $200 worth of strippers and spicy fried chicken couldn't fix.
I did a line off of, and then danced on top of a table older than this country.
Harvard is great.
Tomorrow's lesson plan is going to be on hangovers and why drinking during the week is never a good idea. I hope my boss approves.
Randomize
