your horoscope this morning...very interesting...good luck today
i like that you affectionately refer to him as "creepy" ever time you talk about him
I only make drug deals in a British accent. It's my way of making sure it doesn't get too sketch.
thank you for introducing me to everyone on chat roulette as I was passed out.
I tried to cut him off and he said "I was the president of a fraternity for 3 years, I could outdrink God."
you woke me up just to tell me that I was beautiful in every way possible. Then you proceeded to fall asleep with your mouth on my boob.
They nicknamed me the gargoyle. Sex with me is getting gargoyled. The last one I fucked yelled "gargoyle me" for dirty talk. I think fucking me is part of their pledging initiation. Somewhat OK with this.
Just saw two dudes run across the street carrying a mini keg and a scaled model of the empire state building. Missed this town
OMG bikini contest at the bar. You can see this one chicks scar from her c-section and I'm pretty sure she is the best of the bunch.
I wanna throw up and cum in that order
Guess who just got caught by mall security having sex in a car in the parking lot... at noon. This chick.
These rednecks don't fuck around. This party is completely BYOB and we now have 6 kegs, 3 of which have already been emptied.
Only if I get to be Gritty
How would you be Gritty for a fantasy hockey league?
Don't worry about it.
How was your night?
Good. I made people cry and run home
It was just another case of she fell in love I fell asleep.
Randomize
