i mean i cnt help that this campus has the highest STI rate
Is it socially acceptable to order two burrito bowls?
anything's socially acceptable if you do it with enough confidence
If i spent $300 & took that thing home i would hate myself today.
You refused to get in the cab so we rock paper scissored to decide who walked you home and the fat guy was it. So don't blame your poor hook-up choice on me; it was all you.
Those titties aren't worth a lifetime of listening to her talk about gluten free yams and japanese manga.
I think if I set up a series of baby gates up the stairs each one more difficult to undo then the last that should be able to stop your drunk vagina.
I believe nudity is frowned upon at that establishment
So Monday we're lesbians.
Deal. This decision is final and any rebates on this will result in losing an eyeball.
Oh wow. I almost tweeted #TweetFromTheBackOfACopCarTuesday but I didn't think it was that appropriate
Can't tonight. I'm supposed to get drugs for some college kids. Just doin my part in helping to enlight america's future
time out. can we just pause the wholesome understanding friendship thing and be fuck buddies for a night?
we need a secret handshake
Dude you were sitting in front of me eating uncooked bow tie pasta...
Is it sad that I planned a a romantic trip to dunkin donuts for and with myself on Saturday, then added an equally romantic after midnight stroll through the half off candy sale? I find that worthy of adding a few cats to my collection agree?
That's brilliant but could get us arrested. Give me shots until I shout LET'S DO THIS
So how often do you needs to see my tits today then?
Randomize
