Do you think Capital One would let me put the Tub Girl picture on my Capital One card?
Beat you to it.
I don't get it.
Me neither.
But I masturbated to it anyway.
I was in a gas station that sold tazers and I just saw a billboard that said "Strippers, need we say more?" God I love Georgia!
Im sick of reading dumb tattoos while having sex
At my internship. I get drug tested tmr at 2
Are they going to pay you for the one day you worked?
am i so blindsided by his great personality that i'm hooking up with an ugly guy?
i thought you knew
While looking for an apartment, I've realized that the way I rate balconies is on the "how easy would it be to smoke weed here" scale.
What other scale is there?
We're so stoned that were both cuddling on the couch and crying over Forest Gump while eating popcorn. She asked me if I'd fuck away the sadness. I think she's serious.
You can laugh all you want but 99 grapes is a lot stronger than what you were drinking.
I guess I'll just chalk it up as a learning experience and a lot of great sex.
First week is awesome. Freshman girls prancing around everywhere like newborn baby deer looking for a dick to jump on
Ended up at the strip club, got told I should be a dancer 4 times, got free tacos and my hot TA slide in the dms. How was your night?
I’m appalled by how severely I lower my standards when I’m horny & impaired
I am way to hungover for it to be Thursday.
I am so dumb. I made a mistake and let him get away.
Don't worry, there are other penises in the sea.
Thanks, mom.
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