You'd love this place it's beautiful. Plus these people smell like garlic
you were convinced that if all her tampons were gone her period would stop, so you started eating them.
twelve hours since my last beer and i just blew a .08, time to go to the library
I was rolling balls and tried to donate blood as an act of kindness to the sick person who would receive it
She started ignoring us once we told her we were out to celebrate your abortion. Who knew strippers could be judgemental?
I was really excited when he said that condoms didn't fit him, then he added "they fall right off"...
It was like a Thanksgiving meal, which you spend 8 hours cooking, and the family wolfs down in 20 minutes. All that flirting and build-up for like 90 seconds of pumping and he was gone in a flash, never to be heard from again.
My life is a video game called get the drunk princess back to her castle, thank you to all that participated
I'm gonna go ahead and say I love our drinking habits but anytime we roundhouse a 750 of Schnapps on the way to a non competitive bowling league we might have problems
of all the things that should kill me, scurvy wont be one of them
Considering all of my stomach contents ended up in my center console, I'm a bit peckish.
I'm actually really happy I can say that my first body shot was out of a gay strippers massively ripped chest
I think I found my saving grace in the form of a beard at the bar.
i came so much i feel like i were to try again, only dust would come out. and maybe glitter
Hey. Did I get punched in the face last night?
Yeah. I told you I would and you didn't believe me.
Randomize
