he put his p in my v, then his p in my a, and then tried to put the p in my m? first, double dipping is rude. second, i'm glad he finished shortly after that, i'm afraid of where he'd try to stick it next. my ear?
DAMN! I hate it when i drunkenly erase all my "sent message" and wake up in the morning and my inbox is full of "WTF?" and "Huh?" messages.
If you are in NYC and not seeing anyone, you should come fucke me now because:1 i am not in love with you anymore, 2 i am drunk enough where i won't feel the n eed to kisx you awardly to avoid your beard, 3we have unfinished business that i wpn't get -assed unyil orgass have been had, 4 i really really want to
Teenaged girls are God's best work and the Devil's best tool. Remember that my friend.
okay, this is the fifth time he asked if it was in yet. maybe i shouldn't have dated a blind guy.
I just used my thong as a hair tie. I think I reached my limit.
I think ill wear my dads dashiki but make it sluttier. We shall see
He was barking to the beat of "I like to fuck" and then chugged 3 beers and fell off the deck.. I should have gotten community service hours
I saw that you sent me a photo and the first thing out of my mouth was "I swear if it's another photo of a dick poking out of a bubble bath"
So I just had breakfast and then sex in a parking garage before he went to school and thus I am loving my life
I was standing in my mom's kitchen in only my neon green thong, eating pizza over the garbage can, and sobbing while he was yelling at me.
Watching Rudolph while stoned is practically a religious experience.
Don't forget my pants whenever you come over, otherwise we can't get in.
It's not a hangover, it's "slept on a couch with another person and said person moves a lot and is loud"
It was an entirely appropriate time and place for sexual thoughts.
That doesn't make it ok to play by play me your honeymoon!
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