erin looks like she hung out with the sham wow guy last night. she's got the beat up hooker look goin' on
How, after 24 years of life, did I manage to revisit breastmilk
she was so hung over that i had to hold her hair while she puked in a trash can in the middle of the student center as new freshman and their parents walked by.
I drove to Chevron at noon and the Hatian lady goes "Oh, nothing to drink yet white boy?"
Sometimes I wonder why.. Then I realize I can't fool myself with that question bc we all know it's bc of his enormous dick
His appology was" look at it this way, at least you'll give better head without those teeth.'
Don't judge me. If you're going to fall off a bed you might as well do it gracefully into a bag full of beer.
found glitter on my cock. thank you for bringing me to that dance recital.
I can't tell which way is up. Too many corners around his house too. An arbitary assimilation of edges.
Christ, I swear you are the high man's Dr. Seuss.
When a man can't even pay attention to you when you're telling him about how big his penis is, there's something wrong
just for future reference, lake water is NOT mix for hard stuff. nor is it an adequate substitute.
Who knew I could feel anymore shameful at the bar than i usually do...I think my bartender recognizes me from the walk of shame out of his house after i hooked up with his son yesterday
I don't want to be drunk any more. Can you hit the off switch?
Lunch?
Massage?
Spanking with handcuffs?
try to milk me bitch
Randomize
