Still drunk and leading the team through the 9am sales meeting. I'm pretty sure this is why there aren't more 26year-olds in management.
Oh and then this old man who saw it happen goes "don't do that"
Hahaha what a helpful old man. Like you thought it was normal to be spilling gas everywhere.
She swallowed my jizz and then took a shot of jack daniels and said "chaser." This cant be real life.
the brownie started to kick in before i finished the essay... it became a race against my own increasing intoxication
Nothing says "I'm a sorority girl" like puking at 830 in the am, wearing my anti-hazing pin, and getting ready for a tea party.
i'm having flashbacks of crying and telling you i was made out of egg salad.
I just found a GIANT thermos of sangria in my sink. I don't know if its still good to drink, but its good to drink.
Should have told me the night we were talking about deal breakers that vomming outside your car was one of them. I would have taken a cab back
Just made nicotine water. Ithink i'm having a heart attack.
I'm sitting next to a ginger. She is decked out in olive green. Gingers fucking love olive green.
I've woke up with the same hoodie on backwards, twice this week. I think that's a record
Would you go as one half of Harry and Lloyd in Tuxes to Aaron's wedding?
And if you haven't kicked a pigeon you haven't started your morning right
ICE CREAM AND CAKE BITCHESSSSSS
I was pretty pissed in the morning when I realized he had fucked the fake tattoo right off my chest.
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