PS the last 3 guys I've hooked up with were a CEO, a mechanical bull operator and a magic the gathering player...I need a type...
Ur type is ready and willing
There's a girl in my class named "La-a" pronouced "Luh Dash uh" I hate everyone
i slept with her, drove her to her sisters house to babysit, and then drove around the block where i met her sister and had sex with her in my van. I'm family Friendly!
happy birthday! Any relationship between us is now officially illegal.
i was staring at it trying to desperately see a vagina
i don't care how ready and willing she is. she is where penises go to die
He picked me up went to throw me on his bed. I landed on the wood frame. That's how I broke my rib. We still fucked. Thanks tequila. Best injury ever
We picked up some guys dressed as shamrocks at taco bell. I will text you with further information.
Oh and .... you'll love this: my life coach says you writing my online dating profile isn't a horrible idea.
Omg this place. I'm at a neighborhood party. My mom has kissed two other moms. Where am I
Like you haven't hit rock bottom until you have had to throw your own turd out a window
My ex is having a baby and I'm over here planning my dogs birthday celebration...
When is the party?
Your youporn search history says otherwise.
Keep two things coming: nudes and puppy pictures
my favorite part was when you kept waving @ that guy and insisiting it was your cousin..and it wasnt and wondering why he wasnt waving back lol you were legit PISSED
Randomize
