Just watched 1 guy 1 jar with my mom. Awkwardville...
I think it's safe to say me, swords and vodka can never be aloud in the same room again.
I will never swim in a flooded basement again..
Ladystoner tip: if eyes are bloodshot, lime green eyeliner makes them appear less red. its basic artt.
Meghan got a job at the bar. We're now morally obligated to drink. Is this what dreams are made of?
Do you think it's illegal to work at a bar if you're on probation for a DUI? I need a night job where I can meet men.
I made out with about ten people last night. And four of them were just on the way to my car from the bar. And one was my roommate.
Nothing says "back to school" like walking in the first day with a hangover
The only downside to doctor sex is that getting choked with a stethoscope leaves marks.
If muffins & morning blowjobs don't make him happy, frankly, I don't think anything will.
Please note that in response to your post about your dog's jaws clamped hard around a stick, I did not comment, "Takes after his dad." You're welcome.
I also farted in bed this morning and said, "I don't even care. My body deserves that."
Hey. You got pizza and sex. How much more can you ask for?
Come to my place after work and we can discuss our finances over a coors delight and a fire ball shot
I just saw a guy walking down the street without a shirt on and holding a samari sword....
Randomize
