try this...when you orgasm scream his address including city state and zip...
you know that annoying kid in my psych class? accidentally hit him in the face with a door today. perfect end to the semester.
what you doin?
I just woke up vomited poured myself a chocolate milk and turned on the peoples court. you?
reread what you just wrote and reconsider your entire life
frankly if you're gonna get kicked out of your place, hooking up with your gay roommate's boyfriend would be the most entertaining way to do it.
Have invented new cocktail. Any flavor of crystal light and vodka. I call it "I am going to die alone"
i just complicated the hell out of my summer by fucking him this early on
Horrible. I told her my girlfriend is in the hospital and she tried to give me a lapdance.
I'm out of mixers so I am using sugar water. Times are tough.
Every time I drink before 5 somebody's pet dies
Stop drinking before 5
Easier said than done
I didn't have the heart to tell him that the reason my vagina was so "prelubricated" was because I had just had another gentleman caller an hour earlier. So, when he commented about how turned on I appeared, I just went with it.
You started pulling out condoms from your fanny pack and threw them at all the couples on the beach
I'm really sorry I hooked up with your student on the dance floor..
How bad was it?
Stopped drinking Sunday, hungover on Tuesday bad.
I may not have my dignity, pride or sanity but I have my pants.
He's the first boyfriend I wouldn't cheat on. This is a really big deal for me
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