i slept with him so i could steal the screens out of his sink faucets for my bowl when he went to sleep. not because he's funny.
Housing came buy and confiscated our shopping cart :(
She has puke on the back of her shirt not quite sure how the hell she did that
sounds like it. if it makes you feel better i blew up a $75000 farm tractor last night.
This taxi driver is not happy I am in drag
I still can't get the taste of her nipples and the udon noodles out of my mouth
i liked you for your lack of ambition and abundance of weed
While I'm here in reality dreaming of catching chili cheese fries with my mouth out of t shirt guns like Jesus is real
Mischief managed.
YOU ARE NOT A MARAUDER, WHAT THE FUCK DID YOU DO NOW?
the staff put glowsticks in the urinals of the porta-pottys last night and honestly drunk me has never been more grateful for anything in his life
So is seeing the guy's penis that I'm talking to something you're into or nah?
Actually we have similar relationship styles aka no relationship... it could work
The cop asked me why my pants were around my knees when he woke me from the sink, i replied "Officer, my underwear is still on, nothing bad happened" then he nodded in acknowledgement and we carried on with the paper work.
It's official, I'm not staying in tonight
What caused that decision?
You only live once
Sexual Dilemma - Covid Edition: Flirting with a cute frat boy. The Cougar in me wants to go back to his frat house and fuck his cocky brains out. The adult in me doesn’t want to get Covid and have to quarantine in a frat house for 2 weeks\n
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