Afterall, it is the real San Francisco treat
it was all downhill after the free blackjack taco
I wish I could get plan B off e-bay so it would be a secret and cheap.
he was walking around the bar drinking wild turkey and gobbling simultaneously
She had a maple leaf tattoo behind her ear and told me she liked my "playoff beard".
Only in Canada would your laziness be applied to hockey and rewarded.
btw i have an angry voicemail of you yelling at me to get you a sandwich or die.
We need a plan...
Find random men. Use them as sexual objects. There's our plan.
On the bright side, at least we arent the generation raised by fucked up teen moms.
we need to drink more beer. the fridge wont close.
I thought it went well, but he just sent me a video of me sucking an icicle on the fire escape of his building with the caption "The ice got more than I did." Somehow I feel like I owe him a blowjob.
All I'm asking for is flower occasionally, and in return you get to come home to me naked in heels. Is that to much to ask for?
It's like the sisterhood of the traveling vaginas over here
You guys wanna start around 10:30 tomorrow?
We can start at 5am for all I care. You ask like I have plans.
I behisseth at your soul from the deepest darkest depths of the earth
GOD DAMN IT I COULD HAVE HAD A MOTHERFUCKING 3 WAY LAST NIGHT. WHY BOOZE, WHY?!
Randomize
