There's a "art of the blow job" class in the city. We should go
Baby, I'm all set with that. That would be like trying to teach bruce lee how to kick someone in the head
dpoing straight shots of jhameson. boys are imp ressed. i apologize
I'm like a wolly mammoth down there. what do I tell him?
Some rando is vomiting profusely into the garden outside the employee entrance. Where are you when things like this happen to me?
Vomiting outside the employee entrance
Yup. We're now banned from TWO of our nation's finest zoos.
because i know somewhere at some party, behind someones closed bed room door youre being feed a key full of mollie.
Question: If I got in a car accident and lost my memory of us, would you work your way back just so we could be fuck buddies again?
I'm watching The Vow and just need to know that I'm loved in some way
We need to talk about the sailor moon porn. Do what you want in your room, but I don't want to come home to you cranking it on the couch to that.
But he has cupcakes AND I'm guaranteed an orgasm. .. I feel like I shouldn't even have to actually make a decision here.
Oh and Dustin informs me I'm a legend amongst the freshman, if you were wondering about my street cred
Once you jizz in someones hat, you cant take it back.
I shit like a lady though so that rarely happens
Keep two things coming: nudes and puppy pictures
I'm not going to tell you how to live your life, which includes naming your schlong
TSA doesn’t allow handcuffs in carryon bags. Super fun they confiscated them in front of my boss and coworker.
Randomize