Culvers...So Good
So good. The butter burgers slip right outta my ass.
i am fully taking advantage of taking advantage of him
We had one of those mutual "I know your on a dating website, I won't tell if you won't" glances.
When I unzipped my pants I said "Release the Cracken"... she dug it so we're getting married soon.
im celebrating the fact lent is over and i can give blow jobs again.
He looked at my vag and said "you have a nice situation down there. Good work"
and a jello shot exploded in my bra last night. Now I have blueberry smurfette boobs. Awesome.
You kept going up to guys in plaid and screaming "are you a lumberjack" in their faces
The cop used the word "belligerent" 16 times in the report. You get to bail him this time. I'm not up for it.
The other night he asked if I had a condom and I said I had an IUD. and he goes OMG A BOMB?
Sorry for trying to baptize you last night
You knew the entire thing in Latin I was so impressed
Be there in 20. Want icecream?
sex. I want sex. I like where your heads at though.
Next time you decide to post pictures of yourself in your underwear on facebook, please don't tag me as your bulge.. My mom spent 10 minutes looking for me in that picture. I had to tell her I was hiding.
Is it normal for a guy to send you a dick pic along with “He misses you”
All of a sudden he got that look on his face and ran to the dance floor and started fist pumping to Rihanna that kind of night
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