I've been emailing with a woman. I don't think she's into me, but we've become sorta email buddies. I'm hoping to meet her because on her profile she states she's into 'fisting.' Frankly the thought kinda freaks me out but I'm dying to see what kind of woman is 1) into that and 2) admits it upfront.
home. puking in laundry basket.
Girl just texted me a pic of her boobs with the caption "don't think I'm a whore"
i just used my scantron for my final to make paper shotglasses. i'd say i passed in flying colors.
frozen peaches as icecubes. vodka Sundays just got wayyyy better
Great parenting moment: noticing your kid is going to puke from gorging fish sticks and sending her outside. Then watching her puke on your dog.
Is it bad of me to apply as a night shift counselor at a boys orphanage purely because of how laid that would get me at bars?
I knew it was a good Wednesday night when I woke up tucked in to NOT my own bed with my beer helmet, an empty bottle of Jose, and a trash can placed in front of my face.. Happy 20th!
No...this little piggys going to the bar
I will have you again some day my love. And our divorce will be magnificent
Sorry about flashing you in front of your mom.
You haven't lived until you've snorted coke from a Pharaoh's hand baby
Ask him to BK for an ice cream cone and do him in the car. That counts as a date
he woke up this morning, drunk as fuck, butt ass naked, and he had left grandmas gun on the counter and doesn't know why.
It was bad. U were calling my cat "kittiano" and playing her like a piano. Way too drunk my friend.
Randomize
