Hey you
You're the only one I'll text back during sex. what's up?
Not really fighting over the same girl. He takes her out to dinner and then I come over and fuck her. We've worked out the perfect relationship.
Not sure if he was actually hot or hot in a "he brought a live chicken to the party" kinda way but I got his # regardless
If drawing me a picture of his dick in draw something is flirting then he is doing it wrong.
It'd probably just be a lot of profanity and hyperventilation and deteriorating into tears anyways
so just a regular conversation then
Now go get drunk with your fam and get back into ur christmas groove. No time for gonnorhea
I left my parents and ran through the airport. I was like I'm not getting stuck in Atlanta tonight and not having sex.
Hey so I got my period
Thank god I wasn't ready to deal with sober you for 9 months
I'm all about clean living these days
You started your day with fried chicken and a bloody
... after you woke up in your own urine
Yeah, he threw a chair and hit her in the side of the head. She started hysterically crying and then proceeded to continue kicking our ass at beerpong. The girls got talent.
How hot? Like... how many hemsworths?
i was in class looking for a pencil and found a chicken strip in my back pack. i think i might have a problem.. sad thing is i ate it
our moms work together...I can just see the conversation now, hey your daughter ruined my sons marriage, that's probably how it will start.
I successfully cockblocked 5 people in one night. I wasnt getting any, why should they.
Ok, as his sister I didn't tell you this but he's very familiar with pregnancy symptoms. So next time he calls you fat freak him the hell out by asking if your ankles look swollen.
Randomize
